Brooke here. The ivy is invading my dreams.
So the zombies were attacking, like they do, and the generator kicked on so I knew that society as a whole had collapsed and we were on our own. The Baroness (now middle-aged and had really let herself go, but still wearing the same glasses and latex body armor) handed me a pump-action shotgun out of the back of her armored van.
“I don’t have time to teach you how to use this,” she said.
I loaded it, racked the shells into the chamber, and slung it over my back. Then I handed her my second-best mattock.
“I don’t have time to teach you how to use this,” I replied.
The emergency lights began to flash and I knew they were at the gates. This is around the time I sort of woke up to notice the fire truck and the ambulance in the street. I was still sort of dreaming so the Baroness and I walked over to the windows to check it out.
“I hate it when I can’t tell when I’m dreaming,” I said to the Baroness.
She twirled the mattock over her shoulder. “Consider it a reprieve,” she said. She had crow’s feet.
Then I kicked the puppy’s box and he woke up, squalling, which woke me all the way up, which caused me to realize that there actually was a fire truck and an ambulance parked right outside.* Greensboro has this semi-odd policy of sending out both emergency vehicles when a call goes out for one, so if your cat happens to get stuck up a tree it is assured of immediate medical attention or something. My mattock disappeared along with the Baroness, and everyone who actually existed went back to sleep.
… where I spent the rest of the night dreaming that I was ripping out ivy from around the Japanese maples with my best mattock.
* I don’t know why they were there. Nothing was on fire so it was Officially None Of My Business.