Amazon Wishlist: We have no expectations. Or pride.

Angie’s List: We subscribe to this service so we can open conversations with contractors by saying, “Hi, we found you on Angie’s List, and we leave reviews.”

Bill’s Tree Service: Owned and operated by a man actually named Bill. We’ve given them a lot of money.

Bosch: Almost all of our powertools are exclusively Bosch. We’re not getting paid for this endorsement. However, we would be totally okay with getting paid for this endorsement.

Carolina Foundation Solutions: They kept our house from sliding into the Deep Reaches.

GlaxoSmithKline: Makers of fine anti-anxiety and antidepressant pharmaceutical products.

Houzz: Design ideas. Some magical. Some…not so much.

Husqvarna: Gigantigia, Leafblower of Worlds, is a 150BT. Brooke wants to upgrade to the 580BTS but Brown is all “No, you’ll fly away and I’ll never see you again and I’ll be stuck with this house.”

Roscoe’s Garage: Custom plasma-cut metalwork. They made the Beware of Everything sign.

Zillow: Real estate website where we found this house. Fuck you, Zillow. Fuck you in a profound and senseless fashion.